Reflections the week

Life is just hard. Even on a regular day it can be hard. We're dealing with some things with our 18 year old son and praise the Lord it could be worse....far worse...but none the less...hard!!! But God has been so faithful! He keeps giving us glimpses of his hand working.

Just last week I was weary. I prayed and asked the Lord to just grant me a glimpse of what He was doing....I know even in the hard, the trials, even my failures He is working...but I needed to see something...call it a lack of faith...maybe not a total lack...but I guess I just needed a little encouragement.

God is so faithful and good. He answered my request several times but one He really pointed out to me. It had been a really hard week and I had procrastinated getting Emma's birthday party all put together including inviting all her friends. Determining that I didn't want Emma to think I was the worst mother ever, I made a phone call to invite one of her friends. Well, I believe the timing of that phone call was ordained. As I spoke with my friend (the mother of my daughter's friend) she began to share with me some struggles that they were having with their teen. In that conversation the Spirit of God began pouring out all the verses of Scripture God has given me, all the lessons, all the words of hope and faith, everything he had used these last four years during our journey with our teen...he spoke through me as a cry for courage, a cry of hope, and a battle cry to fight for our children. It was a long conversation and God was not only ministering through me but to me.

Later that day, I heard a whisper in my soul, "Tonia, did you see it? I gave you a glimpse." I realized hat God was showing me His glory-the glory of surviving the pain and grief, the glory of fighting the good fight of faith and the glory of passing it on to others. It is my Life story and though it is not over--it is God's glory and honor and in that moment I realized that though the enemy is trying to kill, steal and destroy our family...what he means for evil...Our God and Saviour is using to make us and mold us and use it to encourage others to trust Him to follow him and to bring Him glory!!! Hallelujah!

Four years ago before our journey began God started breathing in Isaiah 41:10 to me...many who follow Him, have this one memorized.."Fear not for I am with you, Be not dismayed for I am your God. I will help you, I will strengthen you I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
I did not realize how much I would cling to these words, how often they would minister hope and courage to me and that nearly four years later I would still need them so desperately. This last year he has had me reading on in chapter 41 and he has given me even more words to hold onto...And throughout this week I have seen it in action....

See, I will make you into a threshing sledge,

new and sharp, with many teeth.

You will thresh the mountains and crush them,

and reduce the hills to chaff.

You will winnow them, the wind will pick them up ,

and a gale will blow them away.

But you will rejoice in the LORD,

and glory in the Holy One of Israel.

Isaiah 41:15-16

A while back God gave me a visual of this verse in that The many sharp teeth are our prayers...as we pray we are crushing mountains and reducing them to chaff....Eventually they will be blown away....My mountain... a wonderful son with a prodigal heart...I have been incredibly blessed with many friends who are joining me in praying for my son! This last week I believe we have gotten close to making that "mountain" a "hill". The body of Christ in Action!

Thanks to God and Thanks to those who have become my "Threshing Sledge!" I "will rejoice in the LORD, and glory in the Holy One of Israel!"